This is some "homework" that I had to do for the therapy class I'm court ordered to attend. I figured since this is a site to express feelings and emotion, I thought it would be good to show you some of the past my feelings derive from. Enjoy...
STOVER ASSIGNMENT
Time Line
POSITIVE
My Positive timeline actually would begin at birth. My mother got pregnant with me at a young age and
made the decision to keep me as a child. Looking back at the life I have lived and the lessons I have learned from both my mother and grandmother I couldn’t imagine another life to live. I have a strong understanding of morality and respect. Living in jail for the better part of a year has shown me that the
relationship I have with my mother is truly a gift and a rarity. I consider the choice to be kept as a son to be amongst the greatest on this
list.
At 6 years old I met my
biological father for the first time. It wasn’t long after I met him that he and
my mother got married. My mother was a great source of lessons for morality, but
my father became a role model for my hobbies and interests.
7 my parents were married.
At 8 years of age, June 26
1998 my sister was born. This was a positive shock to my life as an only child
for 8 years. It was here I began to mature quickly as I felt obligated and
responsible for taking care of my new little sister.
10, my brother was born. The
need for maturity and understanding of responsibility increased. I was now a
decade old and was gaining the knowledge most men don’t learn until they have
children of their own. I cared for my brother and sister as if that was my soul
purpose.
At 16 I gained my first job
working with my uncle leveling the foundation of houses. This is where I learned
proper work ethic.
At 17 I gained my first
taxable job working for a Taco Casa in Texas. I held onto this job for 2 years
until I moved out of state.
At 18, I graduated High
school with a 3.64 GPA; I paid $400 for a High School Equalivancy Exam and
graduated 4 months ahead of my class. On April 8th, I started to date a friend of mine from
school who became my first sexual experience. We dated for 5 months before we
got engaged on September 5th.
Not long after that I moved into my first apartment with her.
At 19 I went to my first 4
day motorcycle rally called Hogrocktoberfest.
And at 20 I went to my first
4 day concert called the Gathering of the Juggalos.
23(Present), my mother
adopted my cousin’s baby Emily. She is a little Gremlin, but she is growing up
in a good family. And on March 15th I was given 4 years of probation instead of 5 to 7 years in prison.
That is big enough of an event to consider a plus given the circumstances.
NEGATIVE
My negative list begins at 8
or 9 years of age. I don’t remember the exact date because it all seems like a
stretch of horrible events. My sister was born without a soft spot, so surgery
was needed to correct it. The months of doctor visits and test lead to the
climax of her surgery. She came out fine and suffered no repercussions from it,
but what followed next didn’t leave all that much time to
celebrate.
10 or 11 years old, history
repeated itself with my younger brother. He too was born without a soft spot.
We were told that this birth defect was such a rare occurrence, that the last
family to have it happen with back to back pregnancies was 20 years prior to my
brother and sister’s. We were just lucky I guess. My brother, unlike my sister,
didn’t make it out of the surgery unscathed. It gave him a learning disability
enough to the point to where the doctors diagnosed him with autism.
At 11 my mother had a tubal
pregnancy that caused her fallopian tube to rupture, the child to miscarry and
it put her in the hospital for a while. Later that same year my father was
admitted to the hospital for a collapsed lung. Years of heavy smoking took its
toll on his lungs and they had to filter the tar from his lungs to re-inflate
them. This event is what deterred me from smoking for life. The filtering
process took some time to do, so we were able to see him while it was being
done. Watching the tar come out from a hole in his chest, through a tube and
into a bag gave me a first class look into what effect smoking has on the body.
At 11 I fell off my bike and
broke/fractured my wrist. The doctor really wasn’t sure which it was because I
had chipped one of the 12 bones in my wrist, but did nothing but jam them all
together. To this day I still have problems with it.
At 13 my parents got a
divorce. Separating off and on for the previous 3 or 4 years, it lead to a big
fight after the right mixtures for disaster. This is something I wouldn’t
consider the worst thing on my list, but its close. This fight and separation
was the last time I saw my father, and it all happened on my 13th birthday. The only positive to come out
of this tragedy was this is the moment I reached full maturity. Taking care of
my family became priority and full time obligation.
At 14 we moved into a
government house because my mom was having trouble paying bills and I was too
young to find a job anywhere. Besides that, if my mom had a job, it was my duty
to care for my brother and sister.
15 years my mother needed a
change of scenery so she took me, my brother and sister, and my grandmother and
moved to Texas. The plans they had prior to moving down was abruptly changed as
soon as we got there, so without a home or a place to live, we moved into a
Woman’s shelter in Fort Worth. Living there was difficult, being a 15 year old
male in a shelter full of women who either feared or hated men made it worse.
The next oldest child they had living there was 9, so they didn’t have a school
plan for me in their school they kept down stairs. So I just did a bunch of
assignments out of an English book. My brother being autistic didn’t have a
class available to him, so he stayed up stairs with my mother. My mother and
grandmother had to work in the kitchen and wipe down tables to earn these little
yellow dollars so they could buy hotel shampoos from the office. We couldn’t
leave the building without scheduling a time to leave a day in advance, and none
of the windows could be opened otherwise an alarm would sound. There wasn’t
enough room for my grandmother to sleep with us so she slept in another room
away from us. The worst of it was we had to share our room with total strangers.
Fort Worth isn’t really known for its friendly people or the mannered and moral
people I was used to. We had things stolen from us and nothing could be done
about it. We lived in that shelter for around 2 or 3 months, but it felt like
twice that. We finally got an apartment in Weatherford, Texas and escaped that
horrible place.
At 19 my relationship with
my Fiancé ended. She had lost her job and stayed at home texting people on this
mobile website. Out of curiosity I looked at some of her messages and they were
all about getting and sending nude pictures. When I confronted her about it I
told her that the relationship wasn’t going anywhere so I ended it. She moved
out of the apartment making the biggest mess she could leaving. She spilled old
drinks she had left on the kitchen counter on the floor, ripped up photos of
us, snapped my keyboard in two, and took everything she could, including all of
the silverware, the shower curtain, and the toilet seat. The next day she came
back with the intent of staying on the grounds of being half of the lease
agreement. This is what drove me to move to Illinois. Not having the funds at
the time to move I placed all of my things in a storage shed and headed north
with my mother. It wasn’t long after that I learned my shed had been broke into
and most of my stuff had been stolen. When we called the Texas police to file a
report, they told us they had more to worry about than a domestic dispute over
items that were in our house. I spent the next year and a half in a depression.
I had my first one night stand thinking that it would help, but it didn’t.
Growing up with the knowledge I had, love was and still is important to me.
Having casual sex was messing with me because I was performing an act of love
but with no love. My second one night stand I tried to force a relationship to
happen with her, luckily she lived 3 hours away and distance prevented anything
from happening had joined some dating websites in the hopes of finding someone,
I had a taste of freedom and love and living in my mother’s house again felt
like a step back. . I began to talk to old friends from high school hoping to
find a love connection, and began talking to a friend of mine. When we went
back to Texas for Thanksgiving I stayed at her house and we had intercourse
multiple times a week for two weeks. I felt like I truly loved her, but my low
point in life just happened to meet with her low point in life and that begot
two weeks of reckless sex. Since then we have had some deep conversations about
ourselves and had become close friends. She is my current go to friend in times
of anxiety and depression. She doesn’t need to do much, but she knows
everything about me and my situation that I feel safe talking to her and
talking is all I really need to do to relieve stress sometimes. I was lucky to
have met some friends in Illinois to help me get back on my feet. It wasn’t
long before I was feeling fine again. Living life without anyone became ok. My
depression subsided and I grew to love my new friends with everything I had. I
owed them everything. They helped me in my darkest hours and gave me a place to
live. There wasn’t anything I did from age 19 to 22 that didn’t involve them. I
was either babysitting their kids during the day up all night talking a messing
around with them. I became family and I could trust them with anything.
Everything was going well until March of
2012.
Age 22, I was accused of
molesting a 10 year old little girl. This little girl was the daughter of my
friends that I had come to be so close to and this news sent me into a sense of
bewilderment. I could never dream of performing such a thing, especially to
someone I considered to be so close to me. I was questioned and six months
later, I was arrested.
22-23(present), I spent 202
days in the Richland County Detention Center through holidays and birthdays, my
little sister being adopted into the family and my step grandfather had passed
while I was in jail. I would consider this both a negative and a positive time
in my life. It was indeed the darkest time of my life, but what it gave me was
an insight that I didn’t have before. A lesson that couldn’t be learned in my
protective boundaries that was my moral life, that there is rarely a bad
person, just a person given bad circumstances in their life. I was given 4
years of probation for a crime I didn’t commit and had to register as a sex
offender. With that came high anxiety, depression, and paranoia. I now cannot
have any contact with my Illinois friends and I am too paranoid to make any new
ones. So I sit in my house now alone in prayer that the appeal I filed for my
case will fall though for me so I can have a normal life again.
Time Line
POSITIVE
My Positive timeline actually would begin at birth. My mother got pregnant with me at a young age and
made the decision to keep me as a child. Looking back at the life I have lived and the lessons I have learned from both my mother and grandmother I couldn’t imagine another life to live. I have a strong understanding of morality and respect. Living in jail for the better part of a year has shown me that the
relationship I have with my mother is truly a gift and a rarity. I consider the choice to be kept as a son to be amongst the greatest on this
list.
At 6 years old I met my
biological father for the first time. It wasn’t long after I met him that he and
my mother got married. My mother was a great source of lessons for morality, but
my father became a role model for my hobbies and interests.
7 my parents were married.
At 8 years of age, June 26
1998 my sister was born. This was a positive shock to my life as an only child
for 8 years. It was here I began to mature quickly as I felt obligated and
responsible for taking care of my new little sister.
10, my brother was born. The
need for maturity and understanding of responsibility increased. I was now a
decade old and was gaining the knowledge most men don’t learn until they have
children of their own. I cared for my brother and sister as if that was my soul
purpose.
At 16 I gained my first job
working with my uncle leveling the foundation of houses. This is where I learned
proper work ethic.
At 17 I gained my first
taxable job working for a Taco Casa in Texas. I held onto this job for 2 years
until I moved out of state.
At 18, I graduated High
school with a 3.64 GPA; I paid $400 for a High School Equalivancy Exam and
graduated 4 months ahead of my class. On April 8th, I started to date a friend of mine from
school who became my first sexual experience. We dated for 5 months before we
got engaged on September 5th.
Not long after that I moved into my first apartment with her.
At 19 I went to my first 4
day motorcycle rally called Hogrocktoberfest.
And at 20 I went to my first
4 day concert called the Gathering of the Juggalos.
23(Present), my mother
adopted my cousin’s baby Emily. She is a little Gremlin, but she is growing up
in a good family. And on March 15th I was given 4 years of probation instead of 5 to 7 years in prison.
That is big enough of an event to consider a plus given the circumstances.
NEGATIVE
My negative list begins at 8
or 9 years of age. I don’t remember the exact date because it all seems like a
stretch of horrible events. My sister was born without a soft spot, so surgery
was needed to correct it. The months of doctor visits and test lead to the
climax of her surgery. She came out fine and suffered no repercussions from it,
but what followed next didn’t leave all that much time to
celebrate.
10 or 11 years old, history
repeated itself with my younger brother. He too was born without a soft spot.
We were told that this birth defect was such a rare occurrence, that the last
family to have it happen with back to back pregnancies was 20 years prior to my
brother and sister’s. We were just lucky I guess. My brother, unlike my sister,
didn’t make it out of the surgery unscathed. It gave him a learning disability
enough to the point to where the doctors diagnosed him with autism.
At 11 my mother had a tubal
pregnancy that caused her fallopian tube to rupture, the child to miscarry and
it put her in the hospital for a while. Later that same year my father was
admitted to the hospital for a collapsed lung. Years of heavy smoking took its
toll on his lungs and they had to filter the tar from his lungs to re-inflate
them. This event is what deterred me from smoking for life. The filtering
process took some time to do, so we were able to see him while it was being
done. Watching the tar come out from a hole in his chest, through a tube and
into a bag gave me a first class look into what effect smoking has on the body.
At 11 I fell off my bike and
broke/fractured my wrist. The doctor really wasn’t sure which it was because I
had chipped one of the 12 bones in my wrist, but did nothing but jam them all
together. To this day I still have problems with it.
At 13 my parents got a
divorce. Separating off and on for the previous 3 or 4 years, it lead to a big
fight after the right mixtures for disaster. This is something I wouldn’t
consider the worst thing on my list, but its close. This fight and separation
was the last time I saw my father, and it all happened on my 13th birthday. The only positive to come out
of this tragedy was this is the moment I reached full maturity. Taking care of
my family became priority and full time obligation.
At 14 we moved into a
government house because my mom was having trouble paying bills and I was too
young to find a job anywhere. Besides that, if my mom had a job, it was my duty
to care for my brother and sister.
15 years my mother needed a
change of scenery so she took me, my brother and sister, and my grandmother and
moved to Texas. The plans they had prior to moving down was abruptly changed as
soon as we got there, so without a home or a place to live, we moved into a
Woman’s shelter in Fort Worth. Living there was difficult, being a 15 year old
male in a shelter full of women who either feared or hated men made it worse.
The next oldest child they had living there was 9, so they didn’t have a school
plan for me in their school they kept down stairs. So I just did a bunch of
assignments out of an English book. My brother being autistic didn’t have a
class available to him, so he stayed up stairs with my mother. My mother and
grandmother had to work in the kitchen and wipe down tables to earn these little
yellow dollars so they could buy hotel shampoos from the office. We couldn’t
leave the building without scheduling a time to leave a day in advance, and none
of the windows could be opened otherwise an alarm would sound. There wasn’t
enough room for my grandmother to sleep with us so she slept in another room
away from us. The worst of it was we had to share our room with total strangers.
Fort Worth isn’t really known for its friendly people or the mannered and moral
people I was used to. We had things stolen from us and nothing could be done
about it. We lived in that shelter for around 2 or 3 months, but it felt like
twice that. We finally got an apartment in Weatherford, Texas and escaped that
horrible place.
At 19 my relationship with
my Fiancé ended. She had lost her job and stayed at home texting people on this
mobile website. Out of curiosity I looked at some of her messages and they were
all about getting and sending nude pictures. When I confronted her about it I
told her that the relationship wasn’t going anywhere so I ended it. She moved
out of the apartment making the biggest mess she could leaving. She spilled old
drinks she had left on the kitchen counter on the floor, ripped up photos of
us, snapped my keyboard in two, and took everything she could, including all of
the silverware, the shower curtain, and the toilet seat. The next day she came
back with the intent of staying on the grounds of being half of the lease
agreement. This is what drove me to move to Illinois. Not having the funds at
the time to move I placed all of my things in a storage shed and headed north
with my mother. It wasn’t long after that I learned my shed had been broke into
and most of my stuff had been stolen. When we called the Texas police to file a
report, they told us they had more to worry about than a domestic dispute over
items that were in our house. I spent the next year and a half in a depression.
I had my first one night stand thinking that it would help, but it didn’t.
Growing up with the knowledge I had, love was and still is important to me.
Having casual sex was messing with me because I was performing an act of love
but with no love. My second one night stand I tried to force a relationship to
happen with her, luckily she lived 3 hours away and distance prevented anything
from happening had joined some dating websites in the hopes of finding someone,
I had a taste of freedom and love and living in my mother’s house again felt
like a step back. . I began to talk to old friends from high school hoping to
find a love connection, and began talking to a friend of mine. When we went
back to Texas for Thanksgiving I stayed at her house and we had intercourse
multiple times a week for two weeks. I felt like I truly loved her, but my low
point in life just happened to meet with her low point in life and that begot
two weeks of reckless sex. Since then we have had some deep conversations about
ourselves and had become close friends. She is my current go to friend in times
of anxiety and depression. She doesn’t need to do much, but she knows
everything about me and my situation that I feel safe talking to her and
talking is all I really need to do to relieve stress sometimes. I was lucky to
have met some friends in Illinois to help me get back on my feet. It wasn’t
long before I was feeling fine again. Living life without anyone became ok. My
depression subsided and I grew to love my new friends with everything I had. I
owed them everything. They helped me in my darkest hours and gave me a place to
live. There wasn’t anything I did from age 19 to 22 that didn’t involve them. I
was either babysitting their kids during the day up all night talking a messing
around with them. I became family and I could trust them with anything.
Everything was going well until March of
2012.
Age 22, I was accused of
molesting a 10 year old little girl. This little girl was the daughter of my
friends that I had come to be so close to and this news sent me into a sense of
bewilderment. I could never dream of performing such a thing, especially to
someone I considered to be so close to me. I was questioned and six months
later, I was arrested.
22-23(present), I spent 202
days in the Richland County Detention Center through holidays and birthdays, my
little sister being adopted into the family and my step grandfather had passed
while I was in jail. I would consider this both a negative and a positive time
in my life. It was indeed the darkest time of my life, but what it gave me was
an insight that I didn’t have before. A lesson that couldn’t be learned in my
protective boundaries that was my moral life, that there is rarely a bad
person, just a person given bad circumstances in their life. I was given 4
years of probation for a crime I didn’t commit and had to register as a sex
offender. With that came high anxiety, depression, and paranoia. I now cannot
have any contact with my Illinois friends and I am too paranoid to make any new
ones. So I sit in my house now alone in prayer that the appeal I filed for my
case will fall though for me so I can have a normal life again.